Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Something To Remember (Luis)

Are you familiar with the story of Narcissus and Echo? Well here's the breakdown...Narcissus was an arrogant, attention whore who dies after falling in love with his own reflection. Echo is the sad sad little nymph who was so lovestruck with Narcissus that she followed him everywhere, repeating every word of affection he's lavishing on himself as if it were directed to her, until like him she wasted away doomed to repeat everything said out loud. What's the relevance of this tragic story? I was Echo. Although I didn't need my Narcissus to tell me what to say, I did it on my own accord.

I wanted this guy so badly that I became a siphon for all the little bits of false affection he'd give me. I come to realize he only did this because he thrives on the fanfare of attention I was showering him with. He wasn't in love with me, he was in love with the adoration. I was being strung along but I didn't care, if it felt that good being used by him then I was more than willing to be used up.

I came to my senses after a while (and after being slapped back to reality by my bff...several times might I add). And I finally figured that I would waste my time and other opportunities away if I don't stop campaigning for the love of a guy who was more in love with fandom than he ever would be with me.

(silver lining: Luis and I are now bffs, and I wouldn't have it any other way)

2 comments:

Tuffie said...

dark days those were

in a time when all was lost to you mentally

and all that lead you was your penis and totally wacked out emotions

people, several bitch slaps were very much required and given during this stage of our three budding friendships

how i'm glad they are long over

o_O

Basilio Bocalan said...

AMEN TO THAT! *takes a shot and looks at empty shot glass

I blame the booze! *looks at bottle of Patron...hugs it

Oh how can I stay mad at you!